He had one of those small greek statue penises
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
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