My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Randomize
