I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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