It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
