North Korea, Best Korea!
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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