Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
where are you?
Hypothermia
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
