I think im going to throw up on grandma
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
