I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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