I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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