there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
