You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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