I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
the day after is always just damage control
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
