i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize