it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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