I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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