one two three fourrrrnication!
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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