Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
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