someone owes me an orgasm
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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