I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize