oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
