Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
