Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
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