I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
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