True but thats because hes a fetus.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
