Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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