I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Sponge bath it is.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I just had sex on a roof
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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