How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
21 People That Had The Worst Birthdays Imaginable
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town