I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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