Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Randomize
