oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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