but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize
