my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
