Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
