he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
