Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Randomize