when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
