tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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