You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Randomize
