so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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