oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
