so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize