theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
And then he peed in my hair
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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