so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
