The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
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Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
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To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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