I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Randomize
