I heard we made out
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
