Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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