is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
