I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Found your dick twin last night
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
