That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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