Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize
